Some people think it’s fine to visit London and immediately identify themselves as tourists. This can include standing on the left side of escalators on the tube or showing up for afternoon tea in flip-flops. Although this isn’t a problem if you prefer, and is actually incredibly convenient as there are usually some of London’s main tourist attractions right outside the door of your hotel. And then, of course, there are the people who want to blend into London life as quickly as possible – a seamless transition from tourist to local. This is doable, but first you need to know these dos and don’ts 😉
Always stand on the right
As briefly mentioned earlier, nothing makes you stand out like incurring the wrath of a commuting Londoner by standing in their way. This may seem rather harsh and arguably a rather impatient approach to life for the easily angered local, but that’s a question for another day. Especially when such anger avoidance can be achieved by following a simple rule of thumb: Keep to the right only. While cars pass on the right in London, people pass on the left. If you’re not in as much of a hurry to get from point A to point B as the other passersby rushing to work, then on an escalator, to the hot-air depths of the subway, always stand on the right. If you make sure to always – always – stand on the right so people can pass you, you’ll never find yourself frozen with a briefcase or a grumpy growl in your ear.
Afternoon Tea
Unfortunately, there is one (and only one) downside to afternoon tea*: if you don’t take it properly, your tourist status will change from inner consciousness to a flashing neon sign above your head that reads, “I don’t know what I’m doing.” But don’t worry: It’s not the kind of rules and guidelines you need to master a master’s degree and a 400-page almanac with, just an overarching theme of formality. For example, wear closed-toe shoes and smart clothes. This includes a fine balance because if you showed up in a ball gown (who doesn’t bring a ball gown on their trip to London?), you’d be out of place, too. Just keep things “smart casual” but focus on the smart side of the spectrum. A notable faux pas is sticking your pinky out while sipping your tea – don’t do it, no matter how many shows on the Cartoon Network suggested that was the way to go. It’s all a bit of a myth whose origins no one knows for sure, but pinkies-out is just not how the Queen would do it, and therefore not how you should do it. The one thing you don’t have to worry too much about is the order in which you enjoy your scones with cream/jam. Purists will say that you spread the cream on them first but let’s face it, do it the way you love it.
Slang
If you barge into a pub and try to order yourself a pint in Cockney slang or yell “Cheers, Guv” when you receive it, you’re likely to get some strange looks and maybe even make the bartender question whether you’ve had too much to drink; knowing about a city’s local slang can help you feel at home in it. For example, this has made its way into this list without even an introduction because it’s such a commonly understood expression: referring to the London Underground as the “Tube” is a given. This is especially helpful for newcomers to the city since you’ll probably need to ask for help at some point, simply saying “Which Tube will take me back to Piccadilly?” is better than an overly formal “Which Tube/Metro/Subway will take me home?” Another good thing to keep in mind, especially when buying things from British waiters or clerks, is that “bucks” is an alternative way of saying “pound.” So if someone tells you your pint is “five quid,” you know it’s 5 pounds – also, 5 pounds and 10 pounds are often referred to as “fiver” or “tenner” for short.
The Tube is nice, but walking is even better
Although successfully navigating the Tube is a great way to feel at one with the city, it can also do the opposite if this is your only method of transportation. It’s a wonderful subway system that connects the city in incredible ways, but it can be very easy to lose track of how the city hangs together – especially if you’re just traveling through it in multi-colored straight lines. A great way to fix this while seeing London from “above” is to explore places on foot. Often a 15-minute ride on the tube is just a 30-minute walk, showing you that London isn’t just a string of individual places connected by trains, but that each place blends into the other – just the way you hope it will.
London is a great place to try to fit in like a local because it’s filled with such an international, diverse collection of people that you’ll never feel completely out of place. In fact, most Londoners, no matter where they’re originally from, would probably agree that the key to fitting into the Big Smoke is confidence. If you feel like you belong, then you belong. That’s one of the reasons London is so popular. That is, confidence is in part a choice, a choice you will feel infinitely comfortable making once you feel you have a basic understanding.
